Friday Loose Bloggers Consortium: Anger

When it comes to anger, I like to think of myself as a tea pot.  I usually keep my lid on until I'm fed up, and then I explode.  Sometimes I let a little anger spurt out in short tiny blasts, but usually I save it all up to release at once.  I should probably let more out as time goes along, and then I won't feel the need to explode.  But that's my effort at trying to control my temper.

I had an experience lately when I let my anger explode a little.  I need to explain first our church's position here in China.  We have an agreement with the government of China that we will not proselyte, even passively, among Chinese nationals.  In return, they allow us to meet freely, and they also allow the Chinese national members who joined the church while living abroad, to meet with each other freely.  They aren't allowed to meet with the foreigners, but they can meet with other Chinese nationals.  We take this agreement very seriously, and realize that these freedoms we enjoy are contingent upon our upholding of our side of the deal.  This can be very difficult at times, especially when we are asked direct questions, or when someone makes a false statement about our beliefs.  But I really do try to do what we have been asked to do.

This past week I was approached by two women who belong to another Christian church in China.  This particular church believes that Jesus Christ (I can't remember if they don't use the word "Jesus", or if they don't use the word "Christ", but one of them they eliminate) has already returned to the earth for His second coming, and is living here in China.  Oh, and I should mention that in their belief, Jesus is a woman now.  So one of these women came to my house to preach to me.

Having been a missionary myself, I found it very difficult to sit and say nothing about my beliefs.  I'm fairly well educated about the Bible, and I could clearly see that many of their beliefs don't follow Bible teachings.  Many Christian churches in the world today don't approve of my religious beliefs, but even they would agree that this church is way off base.  But I had to sit there and just listen, and not teach what the Bible teaches.  This woman is particularly fervent in her beliefs, and began to show me videos on her phone.  She played music, and showed my scriptures from their modern scripture.  I didn't waste much time before I told her I simply wasn't interested in her religion.  She just kept going on, and wouldn't let up.  At one point I picked up my I pad and began checking my email.  She was playing a song for me, but honestly I couldn't understand the Chinese.  Chinese has tones, but when you sing, you don't have tones, and it's hard for me to understand.  Also sometimes the vocabulary isn't in my repertoire.  Finally she turned to me and said, "Do you understand this song?"  I said, "No, but I'm really not interested in your church."  She said, "If you would just apply your heart to listen, you would understand.  If you listen with the Spirit, then you will understand."  I had heard enough, and I had lost my patience.  I said, "I can tell you, by the Spirit, that I will one hundred percent never accept your religion.  I absolutely do not believe what you teach."  Now see, that is within the parameters of our agreement with the government.  But I had let myself stew too long, and just couldn't keep my lid on.  I went on, "The Bible teaches that when Jesus Christ comes again, everyone will see Him, and everyone will know."  She said, "No it doesn't."  I said, "YES it does!"  She said, "No it doesn't."  I said, "Have you read the Bible?"  She said, "No I haven't."  I said, "Well, I have, and this is what it teaches!  I could never accept a religion that doesn't teach according to the Bible."  See, now that might have been passive proselyting.  But I was so angry at that point for several reasons.  First I was angry that she was arguing something she didn't understand, and hasn't learned for herself.  Secondly I was angry that she kept preaching to me after I had already, several times, made it clear that I wasn't interested.  Third, I was angry at those who purposefully created a religion to deceive others.  You might argue that all religion is this way, but in this particular case, I'm talking about a supposed Christian religion that isn't built upon Christian history. Oh, and in case you are interested, I asked her if she had seen this person who claims to be Christ.  She said no, but that other people had seen "her".  That's pretty much the answer I expected.

 After that steam blew out, I told her that I was happy to make friends with her, but that I didn't want to hear any more about her church.  Yes, she did persist and asked if she could bring some friends to my house to talk to me.  I told her that I had NO interest in discussing her church again.  She tried the deception route and asked if she could bring over a friend to help me learn chinese.  Oh, and this friend is a member of her church.  I knew her purpose, but I told her they could come.  (I should insert here that even though I was a missionary myself, if someone told me they weren't interested, I would leave them alone.)  This week they came over to visit me.  They tried to bring up religion in a sly way, but I once again explained my church's position about not preaching.  They belong to an underground church that is against the law.  They could actually be jailed for preaching.  So after my talk about keeping the agreement we have with the government, they backed off a little.  I decided to put the final nail in the coffin, and explained to them that I was a missionary when I was younger.  I also explained that my family, for many generations back, were members of my church.  The "Chinese tutor" woman got the point, and I don't think I'll see her again.  The other woman is clueless, and still comes by my house once in awhile.  But she hasn't preached to me, so I'm keeping my lid on.  :)

We have quite a passionate group of bloggers in our consortium.  I think any one of them could give you an earful if you made them mad.  Check out what they have to say about anger!  :)

Rummuser, Anu, Ashkok, Gaelikka, Grannymar, , Padmum, Magpie11, andAkanksha,Will Knot, Maria the Silver Fox, Anki, Nema Noor Paul Plain Joe, and Rohit, Black watertown, The Old Fossil, our newest member MAXI! and last, but not least SHACKMAN! :)

What Are the Odds?

The other day I was watching television, and a person on the show commented on a dress someone was wearing and said, "That is so eloquent."  I think I may have even responded out loud, "ELEGANT".  I was surprised that they would confuse the two words.  Later that day a Chinese woman who speaks English came to my house.  As we were talking, she was looking at something in my house and said, "That is so eloquent."  I couldn't believe it!  What are the odds that I would hear that word used incorrectly twice in the same day?

Today I was reading on facebook and saw a comment someone made about a search engine gimmick.  They said that if you go to Bing, and type in "Beam me up", that you will see something fun.  So I did it.  It was kind of cute, but not as great as I expected.  lol  Anyway, it was a little boring, so I exited the window and clicked on a facebook game that I like to play.  The first thing that popped up. on the game was a notice about a new part of the game called, "Beam me up"!  What are the odds?

I watched "Groundhog Day" yesterday.  In case you haven't seen it, Bill Murray plays a man who experiences the same day over and over.  After these experiences of mine, I have to wonder if I'm caught in some kind of linguistic groundhog day!  :)

The Life of Ling Ling: Part 1

Ling ling grew up in a small, poor farming community in central China.  The term "living hand to mouth" really does describe the way her family survived.  Most people in the farming community didn't have any money.  They grew what they ate, and they made their own clothes.  Many farmers wore an "army green" pair of tennis shoes that they could buy for cheap in the small local grocery stores.  In Ling Ling's case, her mother was a midwife, so their family was slightly better off than other families.  But even then, the family was so poor that when Ling Ling came of High school age, her family couldn't afford the $2.00 it cost to send her to High School.  But although she didn't receive much formal education, she gained a lot of "street smarts" living in her little farming community.

 Because her mother had some medical training, she always taught her kids to bathe regularly, and to be clean.  Ling Ling never got lice like many of the children in school.  Some of the kids were jealous and tried to put lice in her hair.  The teacher heard of this and checked her hair, but never found any lice.  

One day these same kids decided they would kick the back of her knee while she was walking so that they could make her fall.  As she walked along, she heard them talking, and knew what they were going to do.  Just as they came close to her and started to kick her leg, she shot her leg backward and kicked the assailant in the crotch.  These boys were quite surprised, and the one who received the kick was in great pain.  He went home and told his mother.  She came to Ling Ling's mother to complain, but was soon challenged by Ling Ling's side of the story.  The boys gave Ling Ling a wide berth after that.

Years later, she saw a husband and wife arguing and fighting.  The man was hitting his wife.  She went quickly forward and told him that he shouldn't hit his wife.  He of course got angry and said that maybe he would hit her.  But Ling Ling had spent her life working hard on the farm, and had developed a fair amount of muscles.  She was accustomed to carrying heavy loads of water to their home, and had worked hard in the fields.  She knew that she was much stronger than he was.  She wasn't just physically stronger, but mentally, and he backed down because of her confidence.  

But she wasn't just physically stronger, she was also mentally sharp.  One day some boys were teasing her and threatened to hit her.  She told them that she had developed her "chi gong", which is a chinese Kung Fu practice of channeling the life energy powers.  She told them that she could shock them with her powers.  She stood strong and confident, even though inside she knew she had no powers.  When some of the crowd of people doubted her, she challenged them to try her out!  She looked straight in to each of their eyes, pointed two straight fingers at them and said, "Do you want to try?"  Then she pretended to send a shock wave to one of the guys.  She said, "Did you feel that?"  He said, "Well, I do feel a little weaker."  The other guys lost their confidence and they left her alone.  She said that from that day on, people in her village showed her more respect.  Instead of ignoring her as they walked past, they would smile and say hello.

Stay tuned for more of the Life of Ling Ling to follow in another post.

Happy Mother's Day

Friday Loose Bloggers Consortium: Letting Go

Upon seeing the topic today, and after writing my last post, I remembered a time when one of my children became lost.  We were shopping in Walmart, and all four kids were with me.  My youngest was about two years old at the time.  My second child, a son, asked if I would take the youngest out of the grocery cart and let him hold his hand to walk with him.  I told him I didn't want to take him out of the grocery cart because he might get lost.  My son, who was about 10 years old at the time, promised that he would hold his hand and not let go.  I decided that since we were all walking together, that there was no harm, and I let him.

I think only a minute or two passed before I realized that my son had let go of his brother's hand, and that my little one had disappeared.  I'm not one to panic, so I called his name, and we all looked in the immediate vicinity.  I knew better than to let my time lapse before acting, so I quickly told my oldest child to run to the front of the store and make sure no one walked out with my baby.  I then quickly found a Walmart employee and asked for help.

You may know John Walsh, who is the host of "America's Most Wanted".  You may recall that his own son was kidnapped and brutally murdered after being abducted from a store.  His mother had let him play in the toy department while she shopped, and someone grabbed him.  Because of this event, Walmart instituted the "Code Adam" emergency procedure in their stores.  When a "Code Adam" is sounded, all of the employees stop what they are doing and canvass their area for the missing child.  This is a great procedure, and I applaud Walmart, and other stores that have put it in to effect.

So when I told the employee that my son was missing, she alerted the other employees of the store, and a search was begun.  Within only a couple of minutes, my son was found.  He was only about 2 years old (maybe even younger) but he had decided to make his way to the toy section.  He took of RUNNING down the aisle, and was found running straight toward the toy department.  Needless to say, he spent the rest of the shopping trip, as well as future trips, riding in the grocery cart.  He's almost 15 now, do you think I can let go of his hand yet?  ;)

Check out how the other consortium members have been "letting go".

Rummuser, Anu, Ashkok, Gaelikka, Grannymar, , Padmum, Magpie11, andAkanksha,Will Knot, Maria the Silver Fox, Anki, Nema Noor Paul Plain Joe, and Rohit, Black watertown, The Old Fossil, our newest member MAXI! and last, but not least SHACKMAN! :)

Found

I want to tell you a couple of horrifying true stories.  These are true stories from my own life.  These are timely stories in light of the news story of the three young women that were found after having been abducted 10 years ago.  This is a subject that grips me more than any other.  I think you will understand why after I tell you about my life.  I did a blog search to see if I have told these before, but couldn't find any, so I hope I'm not repeating myself.

When I was a young girl, about 9 years old, I often spent Sunday afternoons at the home of some fellow church members.  They had a daughter my age, and I enjoyed playing with her, and would sometimes even spend the night.  On one particular Sunday afternoon, I took my large Raggedy Ann doll to her house to play.  My mother had made this almost life size doll for me, and had also made one for my friend.  So we took our dolls for a walk in the neighborhood.  There was an empty lot right across the street from her house, and we were walking back home on the edge of the lot.  We were walking next to the street, when I noticed a car slowly following us.  I looked back and saw a thin balding man driving the car.  He was driving very slowly right next to the curb, right behind us.  He was definitely following us.  Even at 9 years old, I knew he was following us.  I turned to my friend and whispered (afraid he might hear me) "When I count to three, run!"  My friend said, "What?"  I tried again and whispered, "When I count to three, RUN?"  She either didn't hear me, or didn't understand why, because she said again, "What?"  At this point I was getting scared and didn't know what to do.  I quickly said, "I'll race you home!", and I started running across the lot as fast as I could.  I got clear to the front porch before I realized she was still walking slowly in the same place!  The car was still slowly following her.  I started screaming, "RUN! RUN!"  She didn't understand my urgency, but started slowly jogging across the lot.  The man quickly drove away.

I told my friend's father what happened.  To his credit, he didn't shrug it off.  He asked me if I wanted to call the police.  I was afraid I would get in trouble, so I told him I didn't want him to call the police.  I didn't understand that the police are good, and help us.  I just connected the police with being arrested.  So he didn't call the police, but he asked me if I would like to drive around in his car and look for the man.  I told him yes, so he drove us around the neighborhood.  I looked and looked, but never did find the man in the car.

Flash forward about 14 years to when I was living with my grandmother.  She lived in a tiny town in southern Utah.  During the months that I lived there, I made friends with a couple who lived not far away from our house.  They had recently moved in to town, and were renting an old house on the back street.  They had a young son who was about 6 or 7 years old.  I always wondered about him because he was part black, but neither of them was black.  When it came time for school to start, the woman asked me to drive her to the school to get him registered.  I remember that when we got there, they asked for transcripts from his last school.  She said she didn't have any, but she would have them sent.  I didn't think anything about it at the time.

Over the next weeks, we became friends, and she began to confide in me.  At first she told me that the man she lived with wasn't really her husband.  Then next she told me that this was his child, and that the child's mother was black.  Then next she told me that he took the child from his mother because the mother was a drug addict.  I felt glad that he was able to get the child away from a druggie mother.  I was young and naive, and I wanted to think the best about people.  Over the next short period of time, she admitted that the child wasn't actually his, but that he had saved him from his druggie mother.  At this time I began to consciously realize that this was an abducted child.  I wasn't quite sure what to do.  But before I knew it, within a matter of days they had moved, and left no forwarding address.  They simply disappeared. Did I mention that the couple told me their last name was Smith?  There was no way to trace them.

These two incidents have cut a deep groove in my heart.  I not only have a fear for the children who are abducted, because I could have been one of them, but I also have regrets that I didn't save the one who came within my sphere of contact.  Over the years I have wondered about that little boy, and wondered if he ever found his way home.

So today I am thankful that at least three girls were saved from their abductor.  Each time I hear of a kidnapping, or a returned kidnapped child, I think about these two experiences in my life.  I wish that I could find a way to help search for missing children.  I am thinking I might start featuring some of their pictures on my facebook and blog.  These children are out there, we just need to pay attention to the clues and help them return home.  I missed my chance once.  I hope if I am ever in that position again, that I will be able to recognize the clues, and help to bring the children home.

Potty Training

I wrote in a recent family letter about potty training here in China, and thought I'd also do a post about it.  Basically, the Chinese use open bottom pants for their children instead of diapers.  Actually, in recent years they have begun to use disposable diapers some of the time, but most still use open bottom pants.  And the diapers are only used by the wealthy.

When Chinese babies are still very small, their caretaker will take them outside and hold them in a sitting position to encourage them to urinate/deficate.  The caretaker (usually the grandmother) will whistle to encourage them to pee, and eventually it creates a sort of "Pavlov's dogs" reaction, and the child will be more likely to pee on command.  There are many jokes in the Chinese culture about how someone walks down the street whistling a happy tune, and everyone runs to find a bathroom.  I might just be tempted enough to try it out.  ;)

I understand the reasons behind the potty training here, but I wish they would make some adjustments.  In this culture, it is acceptable to allow a child to pee anywhere on the ground.  I often pass women squatting on the sidewalk holding a child they are trying to get to pee.  I really don't like the thought of walking through some child's pee.  I still am not sure why they never search for a grassy spot instead of the pavement.  Children are also allowed to deficate in public.  Of course you can imagine how much this disturbs me.  I've walked past excrement on the sidewalk, and could tell it was not made by a dog.  This is totally unacceptable.  I think most Chinese do not allow this, but there are those who do.  The Chinese culture looks at the ground as dirty, and just accept it that way.  I really miss the clean sidewalks of America.

I don't think that millions of Chinese will very soon change the practice of allowing their children to urinate in public.  It is an ingrained habit, and has been culturally passed down for ages.  But I really wish they would change.

I have also seen parents allow their children to urinate on the floor inside of stores.  More polite parents will hold their child over the nearest trash can instead.  More than once I've seen pee on the floor in the store, and have seen the store employee have to come clean it up.  This practice really isn't hygienic, and I wish there could be some governmental training campaign to discourage it.  In the past, the public bathrooms were so disgusting, that it really was a health danger to even use them.  In preparation for the Olympics, the government did a public bathroom clean up, and things did improve.  They do have people to mop the floors regularly, and to throw out the trash.  Things have improved, but the public bathrooms certainly aren't sterile. I think the trend is moving towards more cleanliness.  I can only hope.  But I do think that a huge step is to encourage parents to take their little children to the bathroom instead of to the sidewalk.  I hope the government will consider doing a campaign to encourage children's caretakers to help keep China clean.

Patriotism

I stumbled across this video today on facebook.  I had seen this before, but hadn't seen the whole story.  This man understands the meaning of patriotism.